Author: Carl Page 106 of 153

Hero Worship

On March 3, 2014

I don’t understand the draw of celebrity. I have never wanted to meet someone famous because they’re famous. They’re just people like me who happen to have public jobs.

If only Bradley's arm was longer. Best photo ever. #oscars pic.twitter.com/C9U5NOtGap— Ellen DeGeneres (@TheEllenShow) March 3, 2014

The closest thing I would have to a celebrity hero is Trent Reznor. His music has been the soundtrack to my life for two decades. I have seen Nine Inch Nails play live six times and How to Destroy Angela once.

But if I were to meet Trent in a cafe what would I say to him? Would I even interrupt his day? I may go up to him very briefly and say thank you. Perhaps as he was leaving.

But he doesn’t need me to bother him. He’s a guy who makes music. He writes songs. He plays concerts. He writes soundtracks. He’s a guy who writes music a lot of people listen to and enjoy.

What right does that give me to interrupt his life? I don’t care about him as a person. I don’t need to talk to him. I don’t have a connection with him. We are not friends.

He’s a guy. Doing a job. That a lot of people get to watch him do.

This extends to professional athletes, actors, authors and musicians. They do great work. But I don’t need to meet them or be in their life at all.

Embrace your tools

By Carl

On February 28, 2014

In Observations

It’s exciting to work with people who see technology as a tool to do great work. It’s exciting to see them embrace a new tool for what it can do. For what they can do that before was impossible. It’s exhilarating to be a part of that excitement.

So often I see people nitpicking software for what it can’t do. You didn’t use the right tool. That’s a bad solution. This and this and these are all better.

You know what? Having a tool for the job and using that tool to do a great job is all you need. Use the tools you have. Stop pining for a slightly better version of what you have.

Stop criticizing the tool for what it can’t do. Do great work with the tools you have. They can be bent and molded in surprising ways.

Your meeting platform can be turned u to a video teleconference system. A previously inaccessible event can be made available to the public. No longer would it require air travel and interrupting your life.

We can bring the events of an auditorium in Washington DC to people around the country. And that is magical.

It is so easy to get caught up in the debate about tools. But that’s a losing play. It doesn’t matter what tools you have. It matters what you do with the tools you have. And if you can make something great then do it!

Dude Walkin by Alejandro Escamilla from Unsplash.com

Smile and a Hello

By Carl

On February 27, 2014

In Introspection

I say hello to people and give them a smile as I pass them on the street. I try to bring a little friendliness to everyone around me. If I’m having a bad day, it can help lift my spirits. My hope is that if they’re having a bad day I can lift their spirits.

I may be the only smile they see all day.

When I lived alone, I would take Metro to work, work all day and take Metro home. Besides the people I had to talk to at work I may not speak to another living soul all day. It alternated between lovely and lonely. So I did something small.

I started smiling and saying hello. Some people I saw needed a friendly face. Others needed a smile. Many days it was Me who needed a friendly face. And when you smile at someone, they often smile back.

I got my smiles by giving them away.

Smiles are free and the worst response I ever got was no getting a smile in return. It hasn’t cost me anything to say Hello. Smiles are priceless. Give more of them away and what you get back is more precious.

Opinions

By Carl

On February 26, 2014

In Observations

There are tons of things going on in the world. There are uprisings in the Ukraine. There are human rights violations in Russia and North Korea. There are celebrities screaming for attention to their latest hi-jinx. There are sports teams playing well and doing poorly. There are movies. There is music. There is art. There are books and magazines, blogs and forums. There are millions of things to care about.

Often, people ask what is your opinion about…? But rarely is it worth having an opinion on everything. It’s perfectly OK to just not care about things. You can’t have an opinion. You can say I Don’t Care.

I have opinions on things I care about. I have opinions on things I know enough about to understand. I have opinions on things I’ve taken the time to think about. If I haven’t, then it’s not my opinion.

It’s my parent’s opinion. It’s my friend’s opinion. It’s my news channel’s opinion. It’s everyone’s opinion but mine.

So next time someone asks you for your opinion on something. It’s fine to tell them, “I don’t have one.”

You are not the intended audience

By Carl

On February 24, 2014

In Observations

You are not the intended audience.

Now that the world is universal, we are becoming unintended audiences for everything. We see all sorts of messages and posts on our social mediums. It exposes us to things we’d never dreamt of before. There are vast differences of opinion on the international communication medium.

And we are not always the intended audiences.

Polite reminder for straight people who say "who cares" when someone comes out: such gestures are addressed to lonely queer kids. not you.— Danny Bowes (@moviesbybowes) February 15, 2014

This is a good point that’s worth repeating. I’m a straight white man. The strength and acceptance are not for me. I don’t need them. They are for those who need the support.

It could be someone telling others he or she is gay. It could be someone coming to grips with depression or anxiety. It could be someone joining or leaving a church. These are personal choices. These are personal experiences. We share because it’s liberating to share a truth. But also because of the best thing the Internet ever did for us.

Remind us we are not alone.

No matter how alienated I felt growing up, I knew there were other people out there who were like me. No matter how much I feel alienated, I know I am not alone. That’s a powerful message. And an even more powerful feeling.

You Are Not Alone.

So next time you see someone coming out they’re not doing it for you. They’re doing it for them. And if that helps you, great. But if not, then ignore it and go on about your day. You are not the intended audience.